After this, the conversation kinda quickly went cold, and no one spoke a word safe for Aru and me trying and failing to make small talk with the other two. Sabljevo was just an hour's drive away from the dock town, but the difference between the two is almost night and day. Whereas the dock town is pretty bleak, muddy Blue and somewhat depressing, Sabljevo is practically all vineyards and trees, which meshes beautifully with the clear water of the sandstone beaches. Cecily mentioned before that Grim, Nelly and her went on vacation here, so I'm gonna be relying heavily on her previous experiences.
"Man, it's like I'm back in time!" Cecily raised her arms up in a victory pose as she took in the familiar visage, "It's been years since I've last been here, but it really hasn't changed a bit!"
"I'm glad you remember it as a pleasant memory." Adam smiled back at her.
"Yeah, thanks for suggesting the place to us, I'm super glad we went here instead of our regular vacation spot." She seemed grateful, "Next time we should all go. It'd be super fun!"
"I'll try and clear my schedule up then." Adam nodded.
"So Adam was the one who suggested you two go to Sabljevo?" I tilted my head.
"Indeed, though back then they weren't really all that optimistic about it." He chuckled, "See, in our language, Sabljevo can be translated as the city of sabers, so they were hesitant to take the young and defenseless Nelly to such a dangerous sounding place."
"Whoa, overprotective much?" Aru smirked.
"Don't make it sound like caring for my daughter's safety is a bad thing." Cecily sounded embarrassed that Adam remembered that, "Sigh, can you really blame us though? We were surrounded by swords and guns wherever we went. Seriously, couldn't you have chosen a nicer sounding place?"
"Nonsense! It's called Sabljevo not because it's a city where every dispute is settled with swords, but because some of the oldest swords in history are being kept in its museums!" He vehemently defended the tourist town, "Besides, I went here with Elaine during our childhood and can vouch for the beaches without hesitation."
"Huh? So you knew her before you two got married?" Issei let slip an odd question.
"Of course, we are childhood friends, first and foremost." Adam nodded, "Why do you ask? Is it that odd?"
"W-Well, it's just that..." Issei found it rather embarrassing to explain his reasoning, "The kings in my history often find concubines and such. I dunno, something like the king marrying his childhood friend, it just sounds way too... wholesome? Like, did your parents object to two royal families marrying into one another without any personal gain?"
"Royal family? Pish, her parents are farmers, through and through." Adam corrected him, "Though my in-laws are a wonderful bunch, they still value hard work over joining the ranks of royalty, so they're staying back at their village."
"Eee~, they're just like us, then." I figured, "And the previous king didn't have anything to say about that?"
"The previous king died when Adam became king, dumbass." Aru retorted, "And who is gonna oppose the king's wishes? He really could marry whoever he wanted to once his old man bit the dust."
"A rather crude way of putting my father's death into words, but effectively true nonetheless." Adam lightly applauded, "I did have other girls in mind back then, but many things happened over the years that steadily made me realize just how much I truly cared for Elaine. Before I knew it, I was knocking at her parents' front door, covered in sweat and with a bouquet of the most expensive flowers money could buy."
"That's so sweet!" Cecily thoroughly enjoyed the wonderful story, but Issei was just trying his hardest not to laugh.
"Pff-!" He stifled his laughter before Adam noticed.
"What part of my story is humorous?" Adam angrily asked.
"N-Nah. I-It's just...!" He stopped laughing immediately, "I just thought of something real funny, like a super damn funny joke!"
"Oh? And would you mind sharing this joke with us, then?" Adam smiled, though the expression didn't show the joy commonly associated with it.
"Uhhh..." Issei tried to think of one on the spot, "Two camels come in and one of them croaks."
"Okay...?" We waited for the punchline.
"...That's it." He shrugged, "That's the joke."
"Two camels come in and one of them dies, that's it?" Cecily asked, "Where did they come to? And why did one die?"
"Because... it's unexpected?" Issei shriveled up from the embarrassment, and I couldn't help but feel his pain second-hand, "U-Usually people expect the joke to continue, b-but it's so short and abrupt that it surprises you. I-I think."
"Let's just chalk it up to a foreigner joke we're too local to understand..." I tried to at least be sympathetic towards him.
"Oh." Aru started to laugh, "Ahahaha! I see! Two camels... bahaha! And the other one just up and croaked! What the hell, that makes no sense, haha!"
"Aru, you get it!?" Issei was just as stunned as the rest of us.
"Yeah, it's funny because it makes no sense!" Aru said in between bursts of laughter.
"Yeah! That's it, you got it!" He gave her a fist bump, "This Goddess is becoming more and more lovable by the day!"
"Hehe, praise me more, foreigner!" She looked super happy to be praised, "Y'know, you're not half bad for a time anomaly!"
"Hooray! I'll take that as a compliment!" He lifted her up as they danced around together like a complete and utter goofball duo.
"Is that truly the Goddess I worship...?" Adam turned to whisper to Cecily and me as we looked on at the rather funny sight.
"Yep, best get used to it." Cecily remarked with an awkward smile herself, "This is the true face of the Gods..."
"Gasp! Don't you DARE lump my beloved with the rest of us!" Aru stopped the celebrations to correct her, "Just because the other Gods and I have been unserious bastards thus far doesn't mean Ouroboras is as well!"
"I didn't call you guys that." Cecily denied the claims.
"Ouroboras? Allucius' beloved?" Adam looked even more lost than before now.
Hoo boy, this is gonna take a while to explain, isn't it... Actually no screw that, I'm not about to waste an hour of our lives explaining who the Sun God is to this guy, there are other more qualified people for that. Yeah, we're not here to talk about the Gods, we're here to see some vicious animals!
***
"Chirp chirp." A small bird could be heard singing from a nearby grapevine.
"What's the matter, Ed?" Cecily noticed me staring at it intently, "See something interesting?"
"Yeah, maybe..." I thought of an idea, "There are all sorts of animals here, but it's not like they're all vicious, right?"
"Yeah?" Issei let me finish, "So?"
"So, what if we ask them in addition to the locals!" I presented the idea spectacularly, "Let's have the guys go to the forest and the girls to go into the city. Cecily's been here before so she won't get lost, plus Aru's all-knowing, which would greatly help them in navigating around the place."
"Hm, it's an excellent idea." Aru nodded, "The king's sheer size will probably scare away any real threats in the vicinity, his noble rank will also fend off any bandits and hunters that come about, and you and the foreigner both know the Animal Tongue. It's a foolproof plan, safe from one small detail."
"Then how can it be foolproof if there's even one small detail that's missing?" Issei furrowed his brows.
"Because if you're willing to risk it, your chances are 99,99% safe." She advised, "Bring me along, what with my favor and all, and you'll get the last 0,01%."
Ah, I get it now. If we go with my setup, we'd have the most optimal chances for normal people standards, but going far enough out would make us leave Aru's favor's range. We'd essentially be vulnerable to any and all unexpected factors, and given Issei's foreign origins messing with the delicate equilibrium of the world, we could very well die out there. I'm suddenly feeling kinda scared...
"So then, why don't I accompany Cecily instead of Aru?" Adam suggested, "My rank might not mean too much when presented to hunters and bandits, if anything it'd only make them attack us more. On the other hand, having someone like me with her would both keep us safe and allow Allucius to go with you two."
"Yeah, I'm fine with that." Cecily didn't mind either option.
"I'm not." Issei surprisingly objected, looking at me and pointing to his brain, indicating he wanted me to read his mind.
"This guy was pretty sleazy and desperate with Marina back when the three of us lived together." His projected thoughts read, "As his friend, I wouldn't let Adam go alone with another one of Lune's wives. I know he's married, but you can never really trust nobles to care about fidelity."
"What's that?" Adam asked Issei, "If there is a reason for that, then please speak up."
"Adam, I agree with Issei." I grabbed him by the shoulder with an innocent smile, "Don't you wanna be part of The Boys?"
"The Boys?" Adam seemed way too interested.
"Yeah, we didn't get to talk all that much before, but now's the perfect chance!" Issei chimed in, "The weather's nice, the tree's shade feels perfect... Really, what more can you ask of a forest camping trip with The Boys?"
"Oh, so that's what you meant!" Adam smiled.
"Yeah! We're all capable of taking care of ourselves, right?" I reasoned, "The chances of something dangerous happening are, according to Aru at least, a hundredth of a single percentage! So come on, live a little!"
"Hahaha, alright!" He dapped us up, "Then, what are we waiting for? Let's depart!"
"Yeah, departure!" Issei and I celebrated as we sneakily gave the unaware girls a proud thumbs up, "Let's go!"
***
Now that we were inside the forest, how do I put this...
"It's fucking horrible!" Issei shouted, "It's hot as hell, it reeks of animal shit wherever you look, and these damned bugs are incessantly biting me! Ow, why you little...!"
"So what, guys?" Adam's thick and heavy armor help keep him safe from the little critters, "They're not so bad? Besides, we're The Boys! Nothing can get in our way, right?"
"Y-Yeah..." I tried not to stifle my pained expression as I walked through the tall grass, "Oh, hold on! Shh!"
"What, what?" The other two ran to hide behind me, "Oh, a doe."
"Think you can read its mind from this far out, Ed?" Issei asked.
"No, I can't discern the letters from this distance, but I'm afraid of startling it if we move too close." I thought, "Alright, you guys stay there for now."
"Be careful." Adam nodded, "The Boy."
"That's not how you... Ugh, whatever." I ignored him as I inched towards the doe.
It was currently drinking some water. There doesn't seem to be any rivers or channels nearby, so I assume this is just a puddle that formed from when it rained recently. The doe looked feeble, its legs shaking and quivering as it carefully propped itself down to drink. If I wanted to establish a meaningful conversation with it, I'd need to be patient. Animals feel the most anxious when they're either drinking or eating, so I needed to wait until it finishes to offer it some more water from my bag.
"Parched..." A single word flew out of its mind.
Huh? That word... it's in Entropic? No, surely I must be seeing things. There's no way, right? Why would an animal be thinking in Entropic? It's still kind of far away, so I must've just seen an Animal Tongue word and confused it with Entropic, surely.
"More, please don't go, water..." The doe begged for more water to show up out of thin air.
"No way..." I couldn't help but to utter these very words of astonishment as I finally realized I wasn't delusional.
"!!!" The doe heard me and jolted, thinking, "Who goes there!?"
"...I am a friend." I slowly and carefully showed myself from the bushes with raised arms, "Non possum intellegere te."
"Huh?" The doe stammered back, "Potesne me audire?"
"Yeah, in short, I am a mind-reader." I thought it best not to overload her with knowledge, "My name is Edward Saint. Do you understand?"
"Edward... I am Bamb." The doe sounded delighted to hear that, "It seems we both have an interest in each other's races."
What the hell is going on... A doe that knows Entropic? And I thought I had seen it all with those stupid-ass Gods...